Thursday, November 21, 2013

A little introduction of the old me

There's one character I read in a book. The character reflect a bit of my old personality. If before, i would say,
" Ah, it's so sad to have people keep on saying you are arrogant, kerek and some other stuff (which not to ears liken) and normally it happened if I'm within guys."And again I said."I need to change so I would be like by both and comfortable to get close to." 

A few years, month passed. i managed to change myself a little bit. Although not 100% but there's a change. But after that. I made up my mind again and said to myself,
" why should I mind them. That could also be my charm.A hidden charm which only valued to those who knows to appreciate. 'Arrogant girl' because they are not cheap. They have high value which they permit it only for their husband and those near-relatives. Being arrogant doesn't mean they are bad. It just that they have been use to self-control especially when it's near guys. So, why should I care about it too much? I keep my eyes from watching or seeing them because i'm scared syaitan would whisper to me and make me fall in love easily. I keep my mouth because i'm afraid it would hurt others and lower my voice because that's how I am teach in Islam. Every mean of attitude is because I'm afraid of Allah and it became a habit which eventually i did it without realizing it. But still, i said I want to change into a girl which easily surrounded by guys? Pffft.. Wtheck! Think again. Just be your arrogant self or whatever as long you know you did it because of Allah. They are not the one to give you value. If you are afraid not to found your soul-mate, your spousse, your lover or any related to 'LOVE' then erase that thought. There are so many way which you can found them by halal mean. By parents, friends, spying (ehem ehem) or by talking to their relatives. Just think of any good way than the need of dating and so on. Come on la. We are in modern days. Just use internet meh. Be a clever stalker."

However, things had changed a bit. I change myself to be able to communicate with both and sometimes jesting with them. Luckily, i don't change 100% and still have my arrogant feel. Thanks ummi and abah because your teaching method had made your daughter to be this kind of girl. Who knows her limit, who knows halal and haram in Islam. Who have fear in whatever wrong-doing she might done and repent on it. A girl that keep on trying to balance it between worldly and hereafter. Have fun but with limitation. Thanks Allah for giving me a good parent 

Hua3..Already post it here..Cp from my Facebook account since one of my blogger friend asked me to post it here.. "Dah bersarang sangat" dah katanya. Hahaha..K fine~