Assalamualaikum,
Ya Allah..Today is the day. What should I do!? I'm just a noob who just accidentally got herself into this mischief. In malay, we would say it as "bidan terjun" (ahaha, i like that phrase though. Never thought I would also be Bidan Terjun). I don't know how I work my brain that time. How could I followed my heart when my brain isn't functioning well to decide on decision.
People might be wondering, what mischief that I got myself into this time right. So, I'm telling the stories here.
One fine day, I had a cheerful walk on Facebook. I had a good time spending there until my eyes caught this event page. (I won't mention it's name here). The event kind of interesting and there's no specific qualification needed especially when it comes to height. I'm inferior toward my height actually. Maybe because I once had a dream to become a "Muslimah Model" at least one time in a life. And yes, that might also be the reason I make that decision. And also, they just wanna do the casting. A small event. Not so big as how they planned now (Which make me anxious of my capabilities). It asked for RM20 registration payment. I was okay if it could give me some experience. I really want to know how a casting is made and so, I put my name on although I know its a competition.Frankly, I don't mind if not selected since experience is the precious moment.
And yes, this morning I will have my first Muslimah photoshoot (maybe because the sponsor asked the models for it). For a noob like me who is a total beginner with zero experience or knowledge, this would feel heavy. Especially when I limit myself to only act on my own camera. Not on other camera. I'm not used to people taking my photos (That also show how I have no confident with my look). What I could only do is, pray to Allah. Fuh sana..Fuh sini.. And yes,just walk-in and see what's going to happen next.
Actually,deep inside me. I do feel pity to my mom and dad because I keep this a secret from them. Sometimes, I just want to try new thing but having parents that can't fully understand what I want is quite something. You can't just tell them directly because I hate to have an argument. Especially when it's my first try and they would worry me so much. Nak pulak, industri ni sememangnya kurang digemari ummiku (Although dia sendiri suruh aku jual selendang online & aku jadi modelnya..hehe) I'm truly sorry Ummi, Abah. This will be my last kerja gila. But, if I got offered to be model tudung labuh muslimah,how could I resist kan. Rezeki jangan ditolak..haha..angan pulak. : p
P/s: To my friend Cik Tohru who just might be reading this, I'm sorry for keeping this as secret from you before. Aku sendiri was2 ngan keputusan aku ni. Still x caya.Tapi last2 ak bgtahu jugak(lepas da fikir sedalam boleh la)..haha..and sory jugak sebab ritu cancel date dengan kau. Ade kawan ajak gi kelas catwalk sempena contest tu..huhu..